And the Rest
A few thoughts that didn’t fit above, and on the movies that didn’t warrant a full entry.
It was funny. Quite funny. As we knew it would be. The twist involving X-Force was particularly well-done.
I am, however, glad that Once Upon a Deadpool didn’t manage wide release. That was… it was such a naked, obvious cash-grab, trying to milk some money out of people who hadn’t seen the R-rated version(s?) or who were that curious about the Fred Savage-starring Princess Bride reference bits. Apparently six million dollars worth of people fit that description, but personally, I’m fine waiting for a YouTube of all the Fred Savage bits to show up, rather than watch a bleeped-out clip show of Deadpool 2.
Some people think Once Upon a Deadpool was an attempt to show Marvel Studios, and their Disney overlords, that Deadpool can, in fact, play at a PG-13 level, and there’s no need to let the Fox buyout end the Deadpool gravy train, the way it’s almost certainly killing the rest of the current X-Men franchise so that Kevin Feige can reboot it. To which I say… whatever, man, do what you need to, but maybe Marvel shouldn’t be afraid to make an R-rated movie now and again. Hell, DC made the Titans series and the world didn’t end.
Didn’t see it. The first trailer was a goddamn joke, the second trailer involved the “turd on the wind” bit, not to mention the mispronunciation of “symbiote,” and none of that inspired me to, you know, spend money on it. If/when it shows up on Netflix or Amazon Prime, maybe I’ll give it a whirl when I’m in the mood for something stupid. Can’t be worse than Assassin’s Creed.
While there’s nothing in Aquaman to rival the emotional masterwork of the No Man’s Land sequence from Wonder Woman, it’s still one of the prettiest DC movies. There’s a shot in the climax that I want as a poster. One of those moving posters from Harry Potter.
That said, though, I must agree with comedy superstar and Spider-Man enthusiast Daniel O’Brien…
And another thing about Ant-Man And the Wasp
Some Marvel fans say people shouldn’t sleep on or underestimate Ant-Man And the
As the man once said, I call that getting swindled and tricked. I call that getting tricked by a business.
Which is not to say that all DC fans are better. No, we’re stuck with the
We also have the idiots who declare jihad on critics every time a DC movie doesn’t rate “fresh” on Rotten Tomatoes. Frankly I’d rather align with the suckers doing Marvel’s marketing from a place of love and joy rather than DC’s through spite and idiocy.
Or in other terms…
Coming in 2019
Was a time I was sure Wonder Woman 1984 was going to be my superhero highlight of 2019, but once Marvel gave up their May 2020 spot to appease a rape advocate and his fake outrage campaign, Warner Bros. decided to push Wonder Woman 1984 back seven goddamn months. why not. So here’s what we do have coming.
Glass: It’s out basically now, read a review if you want to, I don’t have one yet.
Captain Marvel: Well there’s no chance this doesn’t make a giant pile of money. It’s not like women saw Wonder Woman and
Shazam!: There is now officially no movie in 2019 I want to see as much as Shazam. There is clearly love for the source material coming from the director, David F. Sandberg, whose Instagram has been endlessly entertaining from pre-production through to now; Zachary Levi is playing the adult version of
Captain Marvel Shazam, and I’ve loved his work since the pilot of Chuck (ditto everything I said about Lee Pace just now); they appear to have embraced a light and fun tone which the DC movies have sorely needed since Batman V Superman, to the point that they did a hack job on Suicide Squad to cram it in. I’m gonna watch it five times.
Avengers: Endgame: Like we have a choice at this point. Either you’ve never watched Marvel movies (I know at least one person who hasn’t), or you’re watching this Marvel movie. No way around it.
Spider-Man: Far From Home: The very existence of this movie gives some stuff away about Avengers: Endgame, but there was nothing to do about that except, oh, I don’t know, not put three movies out in one year, but given how much Sony wants to be in this business, even if Marvel were willing to take a step back for artistic reasons, they still might have had to deliver a Spider-Man movie this year.
X-Men: Dark Phoenix: So in 2003, at the end of X-2, Bryan Singer teased a cinematic take on the big
New Mutants: …Except there’s one more spinoff. Like Dark Phoenix, it was determined that reshoots were in order, and like Dark Phoenix, said reshoots had to wait until after Game of Thrones season eight was done shooting, due to having a Stark sister in a prominent role. They have a fun cast, with notable horror franchise faces… Anya Taylor-Joy, Masie Williams, that older brother from Stranger Things who looks 30 years older than he is… but if any movie next year looks doomed to fail, well it’s gotta be this one. They didn’t get the simple additional photography, the standard, minor reshoots that Captain Marvel, Shazam, and Infinity War all received, but the “complete overhaul” reshoots that almost never lead anywhere positive.
Hellboy: You better bring something special, guys. The last two Hellboys were great and you have huge shoes to fill, so… do something cool.
Joker: I’m not super happy about this but I’ll be there opening weekend. I don’t really agree with this movie’s existence but I’m getting kind of interested in what they’re doing.
Next time… two comic TV shows deal with teens in crisis, and the results are very different.